Share the Glory. Own the Responsibility.
This week I want to write about something that brings together two of my favourite themes: good leadership and the importance of language. With a bit of football thrown in...
I'm going to share the insight through the story of Ben*. Ben had recently been promoted to CEO of his organisation – something he'd worked incredibly hard to achieve and which meant a great deal to him. Having spent several years with the organisation, he felt ready for the challenge, even though it meant leading 2,000 colleagues.
Like any new CEO, Ben had a list of leadership areas he wanted to develop. But there was one he wanted to focus on first.
Ben is a huge football fan. While everyone else was looking ahead to this summer's World Cup, he was talking about previous tournaments and, in particular, England's former Men's Manager, Gareth Southgate.
Why?
Because Ben had become fascinated by one small but consistent feature of Southgate's communication: his relentless use of the word we.
In press conferences, interviews and post-match analysis, even when asked directly about his decisions or his leadership, Southgate almost always shifted the language away from I and towards we. Ben wanted to understand why. More importantly, he wanted to know what it could teach him as a new CEO.
I'll come back to Ben shortly. But first, let's explore the idea.
Share the Glory. Own the Responsibility.
Many of you will have come across the familiar leadership phrase:
Share the glory. Take the blame.
It's a staple of leadership programmes and encourages leaders to behave in ways that can sometimes run counter to instinct.
As you progress through an organisation, much of the advice is about making your impact visible: highlighting achievements, standing out and making sure your contribution is recognised. Yet when you reach the very top, the advice suddenly changes. You're encouraged to step back from the spotlight.
Why?
Before answering that, I'd like to challenge the phrase itself.
I've never believed that blame is a particularly helpful concept in the workplace. Blame carries shame. It focuses attention on fault rather than learning. And the search for someone to blame can consume huge amounts of time and energy while adding very little value.
I first started thinking about this through the early work on psychological safety, particularly the conditions that help it flourish. One principle has always stayed with me:
Replace blame with curiosity.
Just pause on that for a moment. Imagine the difference that mindset could make in your own team.
Over the years, working alongside leaders and leadership teams, I've come to prefer a different phrase:
Share the glory. Own the responsibility.
Leadership built on sharing the glory and owning the responsibility does three important things.
It builds loyalty across your organisation.
It creates psychological safety within your leadership team.
It keeps you humble, reminding you that not only is success never down to one person, there is always more to learn.
Coming back to Ben, I asked him to look for examples of Gareth Southgate responding to questions in this way.
He found hundreds.
The pattern was remarkably consistent. Southgate framed success as something achieved collectively, never as something he had personally delivered. Even when journalists invited him to take the credit, he redirected attention to the players, the coaching staff or the wider organisation.
One of Ben's favourite examples came after England's dramatic comeback victory over Slovakia at Euro 2024:
"The substitutes made the difference because they played a decisive role in the goals and also afterwards when it came to defending the lead. We need that spirit."
Notice what's missing.
No mention that he made the substitutions. No reminder that he changed the game. Just recognition of the people who delivered.
And that's the point.
Leadership isn't only revealed in the big decisions you make. It's revealed in the words you choose afterwards.
The language of great leaders tells people where the credit belongs and where the accountability sits. The very best instinctively say we when things go well, and I when responsibility is needed.
Sometimes, the smallest words reveal the biggest truths about leadership.
*not his real name.
For more on this or any aspect of leadership and performance, with a healthy dose of mindset, sport, and I hope usefulness thrown in, do feel free to browse through all the articles in the Huddle, or get in touch with me directly on catherine@sportandbeyond.co.uk. To order a copy of my book - Staying the Distance: The Lessons From Sport That Business Leaders Have Been Missing – click here .